Take Them Out At The Ball Game

“Top of the 7th, the New York Highlanders are running through the Boston Red Shirts like a knife through butter. Yogi Berra looks like he’s going to tear the head off of Tom Brewer if he doesn’t hit this pitch.”

“Even if he does hit it, I think that Brewer is dead anyway. Berra’s decapitated three pitchers already this season, and it’s only May. Hope he has good life insurance.”

“Mrs. Brewer, my deepest condolences. He’ll be missed. Here’s the pitch, Brewer is throwing a knuckler…”

“It’s a foul. Thank god. To all of the Red Shirts fans praying out there, I’m sure Brewer’s family thanks you. Now, last pitch… wait, what the hell—”

“Brewer’s replaced the ball with an impact grenade! I think that’s a modified Filipinka? Looks like he’s taking a tip from the Chicago Orphans’ Dabrowsky. Let’s see if Berra notices. Here’s the pitch—”

“OH MY GOD! BERRA IS DEAD! HIS BODY HAS JUST BEEN COMPLETELY OBLITERATED! YOGI BERRA IS DEAD! BERRA THE BASTARD IS DEAD! THE HIGHLANDERS DO NOT LOOK PLEASED! BREWER IS RUNNING FOR HIS DUGOUT! RUN FOR IT! RUN!”

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